Monday 21 January 2008

Masih Tak Faham...

She always says: Later-later lah...

He always replies: Takpe lah. Nevermind. (Dot. Period. Noktah. Titik)

She always thinks; What EVER...

Tak Paham...! (Part 2)

7.50pm

He texts: Buatpe tonite?

She feels; Reply nanti lah, aku nak makan pizza dulu.

He calls.

He says: *noisy LRT background* Busy ke tonite? Buatpe?
She says: Mmm... am hanging out with my frens laa in a while. Nak lepak ke..?
Later bo.. (didn't manage to finish question).
He cuts in: K lah. Takpe lah. Bye. *hang up*


She gets into a fit. She is pissed off that He hangs up without properly saying good bye.

She texts: OK. That was rude. Thanks for hanging up. I didn't even finish my question.

He replies: Heheh.. Well, u know lar, "Rude" is my middle name some say...

She thinks; Cheh. Poyo kuase 44. After ten years, still no change.

He texts again: U g lepak ke u g dinner?

She thinks; What difference does it make??

She replies: Dinner + discussion with my frens. Later2 sikit laa lepak. Can?

He replies: Define ur later2...

She thinks; Ish... mengade tahap cipan berbapakkan tapir...

She replies: After 10.30. OK?

** no reply **


10.45pm

She texts: Bagaimana En. XXXXXXXX ?

** no reply **


Midnite

She texts again: hey, nak lepak ke tak?

** no reply **


She thinks; Dia bongok.

Tak Paham...! (Part 1)

2.30 am

She just finished watching a movie with her girlfriends.

He calls.

He says: (euphoric + high pitched voice) Hoi... buatpe? Katne?
She says: Kat Pavillion, baru habes tgk movie...
He says: *gibberish* *gibberish* + bad connection
She says: Weyh, jap jap... sape nih...??
He says: Jack, Jack.
She says: Jaaaack...?
He says: Hahahahaaa... XXXXXX lah...
She says: Ooowwwhh... yeee keee?! Tipu lah! Apsal suare mcm pondan??
He says: *cackles* *hearty laugh*

She thinks; He's high. He's tipsy.

She says: Aaaa... R u drunk? Mabuk kepayang?? Apsal mcm high giler?
He says: Huh? *cackles* *hearty laugh*
He says: Nak pegi minum tak?
She says: Karang2 laa... I need to send my friend back. I'll message u later.
He says: OK-OK.
She says: Aight... Bye.

3.30am

He texts: U larat x ? Katne?
She replies: OK jekk..Where u? Mu ado keto dok?
He replies: Takde kete...
She replies: I'm at home. Where u? Do u need a ride? God, do I have to spell everything out?
He replies: Kat umah..tapi mcm dah ngantuk plak...
She replies: ******. Whatever. Nite.

She thinks; Dia bongok.

Sunday 13 January 2008

Gone

The Secret says (YES! The Secret says...) let go, and forgive, for you will be free of anger and resentment.

Aaaaaah. Screw that! (for now).

Some moron(s) broke into my house AND into MY room and stole my laptop, VCD and DVD player.
I am fuming with rage, I can even snap the neck of an iguana right now!
Red Alert: Animal violance. Steve Irwin will be twisting and turning in his grave right now and Bindi would label me a butcher.

Rephrase: I am fuming with rage, my nostrils are flaring. I can dispense tissues through my nose, mind you.

Screw you bad-ass-tiny weener / tits thief you !!

I hope you choke yourself to death with the wires.

I pray that a stray tarantula will sneak into your pants and feast on your crippled balls. Your balls will turn purplish blue for the rest of your fucking life, and it'll mutate into artichokes!! Hah! Purplish blue artichokes! Take that !

I wish hard that your boobs will distort and become all dark and wrinkly. And doctors would think that you insanely glued sun dried prunes on your chest!!

I'll make sure that the entire Universe will turn against you and your bulu bontot will ceaselessly grow. To the extent that you have to tie them in braids or a bun, coz snipping them off won't work, it'll just grow back - even more.

I curse you turn into a disgusting, abominable pig! Even the pigs won't admit you as their kind!

*grunt*

*snort*

I hate you thief.

Just get yourself steamrolled.

Sunday 6 January 2008

Happy Belated!

Hmmm... Oh heck;

H a p p y N e w Y e a r !!

ShoooOOoot!

Twenty fooking SIX years old.