*Slap*

"When someone slaps you, slap them back twice."


- Courtesy of Shareena Shahir -

Cinta itu...

Thanks Gie - for the quotes... Really, thank you. :)

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.

Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over.

I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.

It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is the most painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let the person know how you feel.

If I never met you, I wouldn't like you. If I didn't like you, I wouldn't love you. If I didn't love you, I wouldn't miss you. But I did, I do, and I will


My biggest OUCH:

"Love is when you shed a tear and still want him, it's when he ignores you and you still love him, it's when he loves another girl but you still smile and say I'm happy for you, when all you really do is cry."

Rambut-ku Part 2

Gavina (my ever-so-bubbly colleague) commented on my newly colored hair:

"Your hair tells men to 'Come to me, and let's do it!'"

????????

But the comments came from Gavina. Horny is her middle name. What's there to be surprised about?

Clueless

I've gone outta my mind, thinking about abandoning Actuarial for good. I've been feeling sucky for the past few months.

I'm plunging into depression - yes, again.

I'm disoriented - when am I not?

I forced myself to believe that I LOVE numbers and the complexity of it. I think I just came to realize that I actually don't adore numbers that much.

I've been living a lie (a lie to myself) for God knows how long.

I was born into an Arts family. But I thot "heck, I wanna be different."
I should've followed Papa's footsteps.
I should've given my passion and yet-to-be revealed talent a chance.

It's eating me alive now.

I'm trying to strip away the inhibitions and judgements I had, and still have about following my heart.

Is it ever too late to start off fresh?

Why should I bother asking what the world thinks.

Aiming for the pursuit of happiness - I am.


*patting myself on the back*

Don't Say It

It's me singin' again...

"...I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
I've heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'Forgive me'
I've seen it all before
And I can't take it anymore..."


And I keep reminding myself that it's just a phase...

Rite.

Rambut-ku

I bulldozed over my stand.

I colored my hair.

I even had it high-lighted.

I'm into 4-inch strappies now.

I'm even considering oversized shades.

Yeah, I know. Shut up.

Umbrella

Who wants to be under my umbrella..??

Hehehehe...